My position here is erratic and my last post was so miserable. Not that I have nothing to bitch about. Rather, it was the contrary, much has been happening around me that I’m losing focus.
Thoughts, which were previously the most clear as crystal to me, have become vague ghosts that flit around in my head briefly before dissolving in my medulla. I know I have done something or many things to write. But when I look at the blank "New Post" screen, it looks back and right of the blinking cursor taunting me and I wonder why I’m still WordPress first.
So the question is no blog or blog? Should I sit down and consciously force myself to get somewhere? Or should I just treat my blog as I go to somewhere where I feel like it?
Of course, most people say that blogs are enclosed for your original material. So why bother to force you? For a moment, I did just that I did not post for a few months. I felt as inarticulate as Jessica Simpson, for whenever I wanted to send a little naive and penalties laid out.
But then a feeling of heaviness ronger grew in me and before I knew it, I kept returning to my blog and look at things. By clicking the stagnation of pages, I felt that part of me was dry.
Moreover, people have been leaving me messages asking me to update my blog. Friends wondered if I had a kind of inward-looking. I missed sharing my verbose tests, whatever the verbose / eccentric, they have been with people who have a fucking read my shit. And while people have preserved and a fucking back, I did not give a shit and I left a vast silence.
And so I think I have a responsibility to update, and in a sense, forcing me to write. I would like to return to the old days when I could and bitch about anything at all. I never want to be disabled inarticulate again. So here I am, trying to fill the silence.
